Bittersweet goodbye

This morning I received the news that my grandma passed away. It was fast, but not totally unexpected. She was 86, and had been sick for many years.

Avis Goodsell McBride only stood 5 feet tall, but she was a quiet giant of a woman. She raised three children, and was married to my grandpa for 63 years before he passed away in April of 2004. She lived in the same house since 1943. After my grandpa passed, Grandma was very lonely. They had never been apart for more than a few days when one of her daughters would have a baby. She missed him dearly, but she loved to be in their home because she said that was where she could feel his presence the most.

I have so many memories of her. I don't ever remember hearing her raise her voice. Not even to Grandpa, who loved to tease anyone and everyone! Her voice was deep and rich, but also completely feminine. As a child, I was always entranced by the sound of her voice. I loved for her to tell me stories about life during The Depression. She said they lived on Spam, but she never got tired of it. After each stay with us, I remember Grandma getting up early to make Spam sandwiches for herself and Grandpa to enjoy on the ride home. Even after so many years, she was loyal to her love of Spam.

She and Grandpa were Coca-Cola fanatics. If you ever wanted a Coke (I didn't, because I don't like Coke) you always knew you could find it in their fridge. Grandma loved to cook, and she was the best. She woke up early every morning to make a big breakfast. You could always count on eggs, bacon and hotcakes at Grandma's house.

Every time they would come to visit, we kids knew that she would bring a cookie tin full of her delicious Ginger Snaps. Always with a piece of bread on top to keep them soft. We would count the minutes until Grandma and Grandpa's arrival. Grandma was a stickler for good manners. We always had to wait until everyone had said hello and we would bring in their bags for them, then we were able to dig in to those wonderful cookies. To this day, I cannot eat a Ginger Snap without thinking of my sweet grandmother.

As a child, I had a fascination with Grandma's skin. It was so soft, and yet so wispy. Like if you touched it too much, it would disappear. I just loved to touch her face. Even as an adult, I have been known to touch Grandma's face.

The thing that I treasure most about her, is that even though she's not my biological grandmother, she never treated me any different than any of the other grand kids. Technically, I was a step-grandchild, but no one would have ever known it from the way that she treated me. She loved me as if I were one of her own. Even though I told her many times, I'm not sure if she'll ever truly know just how much her love meant to me. What a wonderful woman she was.

I am sad at the thought of her no longer being here, but I also feel so much joy at the thought of her being reunited with Grandpa again! She is no longer sick, and her body is no longer suffering in pain. I know that she was ready, and for that reason, I am happy for her.

The kids and I are heading out tomorrow morning for good old Utah. Wish us luck!